Thanksgiving

I never feel more blessed than after a good visit with family. My reason being that there are so many people I know who don't have pleasant family situations. Stacey and I were in NC spending time with my brother and and sister in law and my parents and it was so relaxing and enjoyable. We didn't do anything special, we just spent time together. Sure we Wii bowled a little and did a little shopping, but for the most part we just hung out.

I hang out with enough people now that don't enjoy their extended families or don't have the option to spend time their families that I vary rarely take my family for granted anymore. Spend enough time with homeless people who have been written off by their families, and you'll never take your own family for granted.

Being with family can create some extra stress and its not always smooth, but at the end of the day they will be there. Your family stays in touch even when you move apart. That doesn't always happen with friends. Hopefully you got to spend some time with family this Thanksgiving or maybe it will be over Christmas. Regardless, when you become annoyed or stressed with during the family time just keep in mind that you have family to be annoyed and stressed with, because many don't. And to that point if you know someone is is going to be alone during the Holidays consider welcoming them into your family. They will appreciate it.

Road Trips

I was driving to North Carolina the other night for Thanksgiving. I was driving by myself because Stacey was already in Durham conducting some residency interviews. Six hours is a long time to drive by yourself when you don't have to do that very often. It means you rely on the radio to keep you company. I learned a lot listening to the radio for that long. First I learned that Delilah the stronghold of evening soft rock provides a lot of people company every night. It was clear that people calling in were hanging on her every word of encouragement. The request of a song to show their love for their significant other was done thinking that was the greatest gesture they could make. Delilah fills a need for a lot of people in our country at night. Just goes to show how wired we are for relationship.

Second thing I learned is that hip hop radio stations along the southeast all promote the same types of events, with same types of advertisements, done with same voiceover guys. You'll hear the same thing in South Carolina as you do in North Carolina. And that message: Come to the hottest club in town on Saturday Night where we're going to get as many ladies in as possible to attract males looking for a range of things in order that they will drop tons of money on a drinks. Here's the brutal part. If everything works out for the people going, they'll make a mistake and spend a lot more money and stress on the consequences. The women and men are going for different reasons but the advertisement doesn't tell you that.

Third, I learned that classic rock stations across the trip have all received the same message: They are being listened to by people driving or working and they don't walk talk, they just want music. All of these stations advertised the least amount of commercial interruptions. The classic rock station demographic is traditionally middle class, blue collar, men. They aren't looking to radio DJs for sappy relationship advice. They want relationship advice they just need Lynard Skynard to deliver it.

Its amazing what you can learn about society from just observing our media. Our media tends to be reactive to want people want. Sometimes they get it wrong and the programming gets cancelled. But when they get it right like a longstanding Delilah program or the fact that radio stations continue to sponsor club night parties, you can learn where people in America are at. It also provides a great exercise for me to keep myself busy for six hours of driving.

The Gift Goes On

Friday Night I will be attending a big fundraising event called The Gift Goes On. My business partner Johnny is in charge of this event on behalf of the community outreach efforts of Peachtree Presbyterian Church in Atlanta. In years past the event has raised as much as $350,000. It does this through tickets purchased and then silent and live auctions. There are some great items that people will spend a good amount of money on to have. Things like Masters tickets, a week in a vacation home in Costa Rica, paintings, etc. There are things for $10 and things for $80,000. This year there is an autographed electric guitar signed by all the members of The Eagles. Pretty cool.

I bring this up for two reasons. First, Johnny and I worked together to create some new funny videos for each live auction item. Hopefully will be entertained during the live auction even if they have no plans to bid on anything. Whenever I get a chance to work on creative comedy, I love it. Its a place of passion for me. Second, with the economy being the way it is, there has been fear around the event failing this year. Nobody has money to give, we won't raise as much is all I hear. They may happen, but I think that people still have money to give, they just have to be more on board with the cause. Stacey and I are giving as much as we've given, but we're very focused and specific about who we give to.

The organizations that will survive this downturn are those that continue to inspire and engage with stories of change. What I am learning is that non-profits can't do what they've always done to raise money. Churches are in the same boat. We give our money to what perks our passion and what we consider relevant and truly impactful. We have plenty to give away because most of you reading this are very blessed. To quote John Ortberg, "At the end of the game it all goes back in the box."

I hate leaves pt 2

Last week I mentioned how we spent time in the yard raking leaves and how we need to celebrate the accomplishments. That thought is really being tested now, and my front yard has twice as many leaves as it did last time...and its been raining off and on for two days, so they are still too wet to blow. Its taking all of my imagination to celebrate the victory of last weeks raking. What's worse is the street vacuuming guys didn't come this week so last week's haul is still sitting at the edge of the yard. Its insult to injury.

Here is a cool story for you. I have become great friends with a guy at work named Errol. He runs the mentoring program. All the kids in the mentoring program are children of an incarcerated parent. So basically the odds are stacked against them becoming fully productive members of society. Mentoring is the surest way to help break the cycle. Its really difficult to get people to commit to be a mentor. Big brother, Big sister is always looking for more mentors. The program at SafeHouse (where I work) is so desperate for mentors that many times Errol ends of defacto mentoring several kids in need but unmatched with a mentor. He was telling me about these two brothers who are signed up to get mentors. 16 and 17. Here is the cool part. They are actually looking to go to school. They dropped out for two years, but they want to complete their GED because they for whatever reason have seen the big picture. How many kids in school see the big picture! Errol was telling me that he had found them a day program in the city to get their GED work done and then that program would help them get into Georgia State. The barrier (get this) was bus fare. They can't afford to get there. He paid for their first two weeks out of his oven pocket.

I went home to Stacey and said lets give these kids bus fare for a month. About 100 bucks for the two of them riding Marta (Atlanta's public transit) everyday. I went in the next day and gave Errol 100 bucks. He said "No way dude!" I said, "We believe in what you're doing working with these two boys and if bus fare is a barrier, well we can solve that issue!" Later in the afternoon he called the brothers to check in and told them that their transportation was taken care of for the next month. They couldn't believe it and asked how he was doing that. He told them to not worry about it and concentrate on school and keeping focused on not getting involved in the wrong things. I'm going to get involved on an unofficial basis with the two with Errol's help and I'll keep you posted on how this works out.

The moral of the story is always keep on the lookout for ways to be a part of the solution.

The Concert

Tuesday Night, after months of anxiously waiting, was the night Stacey and I finally got to see Coldplay perform in Atlanta. The concert was at the giant Philips Arena where the Atlanta Hawks and the Thrashers play. Seats over 20,000 people. The concert was sold out. It was a great show. Unbelievable show. Coldplay is band of made up of really talented and created individuals. They all played multiple instruments, they did a number of their songs in different styles than on the albums which is always a cool element in a live show. Stacey and I had a great time.

Yet, I was as intrigued by the fan base during the show, as I was by what was happening on stage. 20,000 people, for over two hours, stood and devoted their utmost attention and passion towards the stage. They clapped, danced and excitedly sang along for the entire length of the show. The entire crowd knew the lyrics to every song as well as the band! They each had paid from 50 to 400 bucks or more to be in attendance. What creates that kind of devotion?

Stacey and I were discussing this on the way home and she really helped me process that question. See, I'm a music guy and she's a lyrics girl. Combine the two and you have a great partnership. She informed me that most of Coldplay's best loved songs and lyrics have a message of hope. The crowd was embracing songs about fixing relationships, and embracing hope. Coldplay has been outspoken in the past about ending world poverty, and were even promoting a end poverty organization or movement at the end of the evening. These guys clearly are driven by hope for a better world as well.

So 20,000 people x all major U.S. and European cities equals a lot of people embracing a message of hope. The message of hope is the same one that the Christian faith contains, though a much more solid hope I believe in Jesus. So why is the church having so much trouble creating that kind of devotion? Simple, a while ago we forgot how to tell the story of hope. The church has gotten lost trying to tell you the reasons you're not going to find hope. Let's first get the message of hope in a relationship with Jesus down and then get at the underlying issues. People want to hear it, they just aren't listening to the church right now.

I hate leaves

Stacey and I spent a good part of the weekend working on the leaves in our front and back yard. In our neighborhood they have street vacuuming that comes by in November and December. Its nice because you just blow or rake all your leaves to the curb and then the city comes by and sweeps them up. No bagging needed. The process of getting the leaves to the curb is still a labor intensive one. Stacey and I both took turns raking and blowing the leaves all afternoon. After we were done, I noticed that much of the area we had just finished was beginning to be re-populated with freshly fallen leaves. As I took in that sight, I couldn't help but think about how isn't that just like life? You finish a big project and the moment you are ready to celebrate it, you look back and see more things to do or accomplish. Well in that moment I decided to still celebrate our accomplishment and be okay with seeing more work. I congratulated Stacey on the hard work and our accomplishment and acknowledged we'll work on it again but in due time. The work will always be there, remember to really celebrate the victories.
My wife baked up a storm on Sunday. She made, ham and cheese rolls, cheesecakes, and muffins. When she gets going in the kitchen it is a sight to behold. She really does have a gift for baking. I wish I could appreciate it more. I'm just not a big dessert guy. I would be totally satisfied for life with a constant flow of simple chocolate chip cookies. With a little milk on the side, I can put those babies away.
Tuesday night we are going to see Coldplay in concert. I bought these tickets back in June, as a treat for Stacey and I. We're both huge Coldplay fans, and she's never been to a big arena rock concert. We never do this, so I figured this was the time to do it. We're pretty excited about our evening. I'll let you know how the experience turns out.
Finally, we had over two of our great friends Friday night for budget entertainment night. That means we made dinner and created our entertainment. And oh did we have entertainment. I successfully indoctrinated two more people into the Wii cult. By the end of the night they were sold and asking for further invites to come play. If only I had bought Nintendo stock when they were struggling. For the record I came in fourth place in bowling. I'm man enough to admit that. It was actually painful. I got to the point where I was about to start virtually rolling the ball between my legs. It would have had more success than what I was trying to do.

Until next time.

You might be a redneck if...

What I'm about to write about is 100 percent true and can be validated by Stacey as she witnessed this occurrence as well while we were voting on Tuesday. We arrived at the local elementary school at 6:30 am on Tuesday hoping to avoid a massive line while excercising our civic duty and freedom. We were somewhat successful. The poll opened at 7 am, and we quickly made it into the building as they allowed their hallways to fill with voting residents. Now let me give you some context for our neighborhood. It is lower middle class to low income. A lot of Black families, a lot of Hispanic families, and a lot of single, still working older folks, and a sprinkling of young couples fresh out of debt inducing school. Its a bit of a stepping stone area for young professionals.
When we had first arrived we got into line behind a white couple with an elementary school aged child. I'd say they were in their early thirties. The wife was pretty overweight, and not well kept. The husband looked like your local mechanic or warehouse worker. I was quickly intrigued because everything they said to one another was nasty, or short. No patience. Really poor communication. Repeatedly the dad would tell the daughter to shut up, then the mom would say to the daughter to hush, and the father would angrily tell the mother, "I already told her to shut up!" Nice.
So until we get into the building we're watching this back and forth occur. Thankfully there was a nice young couple standing behind us which we struck up good conversation with and we the dysfunction occurring in front of us melted away. It melted away until we were handed a sample ballot inside to become familiar with our voting choices. At this point the wife began attempting to fill it out, as if it was the real ballot. The husband told her "It's a sample stupid." However, in all her infinite wisdom, convinced him that because everybody was being handed one it must be the real thing. So then they began bickering about who to vote for, even though the clearly marked SAMPLE wording also contained instructions that this ballot included races out of our district. This ballot also contained those little ovals you fill in completely, and while the husband was doing his best to stay in the lines while standing in the line, the wife was placing large checkmarks by her selections. And when she came to a race she didn't know anything about (frequent occurrence) she would ask his direction, to which he snap "Vote on your own!"
The real kicker though came when we were just about to vote for real and we were asked to turn in the piece of paper we were there to vote on this day, yada yada. He hadn't filled his out yet, so when the voting registration person asked for his he refused to fill it out becaue he had his proper identification already and this waste of additonal paper would kill trees and raise his taxes. The official gained the support of a deputy and the man was told he would not vote until the paper was filled out. While this argument was unfolding the wife was asked if she would like to wait to side while her husband worked out his grievance to which she responded "Not if I lose my place in line!" So the official carefully waived us through and we registered. Then the guy came in after filling out his form and audibly critized the organization of the entire process for five minutes while we waited for a machine to open up. Mind you this process was run phenomenally in my opinion. They even handled this joker without causing any real delays.
Wheneve I think, surely nobody would have trouble with this...this happens. And because of that experience I'm going to recommend a referendum for the next election that allows us to vote on two things. First, not everybody necessarily needs to vote, and two we should give licenses for people to reproduce, because there are some cycles that need to be shut down.

Trick or Treat

Last week's fall festival was quite the exciting outing. I had no idea there were so many small business vendors doing local crafts and food making. You could buy homemade jewelry, clothes, and food. There was fair food as well. I had some roasted corn, fried chicken, and a fried peach pie. Pretty awesome. I also picked up some homemade dutch apple pie jam. Its the perfect topping for toast in the morning. It was also a beautiful fall afternoon. The people watching was a little weak. Quite frankly the people in our neighborhood are too normal. Just a bunch of normal looking families enjoying the afternoon.

This past week Stacey really began her rural rotation in earnest. It has really worked out pretty well. She drives about 50 minutes from our house to get to the clinic she is working at in Calhoun County, Georgia. A couple of nights a week she is going to stay with my brother Ryan and his wife Rachel. They live about 35 minutes north of Calhoun. Stacey definitely likes being with people she knows every night as opposed to most of her classmates who move into the country for a month to complete their rotations.

Next month Stacey will be traveling a good bit going to interviews at potential residency programs. On the the list: Atlanta, Houston, Durham, Orlando, Washington D.C, Cincinnati, and Lexington. I'll keep you posted on how that goes.

Stacey and and I got gas this morning. It was 2.29 a gallon. Last month we paid 4.00 for gas. I don't think we're dealing with a supply and demand issue only. We've got years before seeing incremental increases and now it can swing over a dollar in a month. I'm a bit suspicious to say the least.

Finally, we vicariously trick or treated with our good friends 2 year old John Michael. We walked through the neighborhood for a while with our little ghost costumed buddy. He was pretty excited as you can imagine, and his mother Susan had him totally prepped with the door bell ringing and saying trick or treat thing. Here is the sad part. The kid has a peanut allergy so about half his candy couldn't be kept and Stacey isn't eating sweets, so I got half the haul. Sweet deal for me! While John Michael's dad Johnny and I held down the fort giving away candy for part of the evening, I had a brilliant idea. We were beginning to run low on candy and I had a thought about how to have something to still give away and clean out your junk. Why not treat Trick or Treating like a yard sale, except give away stuff nobody will ever pay for. Like that old stained sweat shirt from college? Give it away! Those size 34 khaki pleated pants you'll never fit into again. Give em away! That clock that dropped off the wall and doesn't work anymore! Give it away. That way you can still enjoy the festivities of the evening and make that knock at the door worth their while. Kids love any gift given to them!

Until next week